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Supporting our
family member

Families are an important pillar of support and we care deeply for them. As someone close to them, we might notice when they are unwell or seem different from their usual selves. They might also look towards us for advice and support when going through difficult times.

Read on to find out how we can support them with their mental health and well-being.

Supporting family members with stress, sleep and other mental health challenges

Tips on supporting our family member

When communicating with them, it is useful to take note of the following:

Starting a conversation

Starting a conversation with our family member about their well-being could be difficult. To help us navigate challenging conversations with empathy and care, pick up some useful conversation tips here .

Learn how to provide emotional support to family members facing mental health or mental wellbeing issues

Be patient and supportive

Sometimes, our loved ones might be reluctant to share as they are afraid of being judged by the people closest to them. When this happens, be patient and let them know that we will be there for them whenever they are ready to share.

When they do share, take time to listen to their feelings, thoughts and needs before offering solutions. Validating their feelings can help them feel heard while encouraging them to share their problems with us in future.

Be mindful of our tone and volume

Sometimes, our family member may just need a listening ear and for someone to acknowledge their concerns. We could speak in a softer volume and gentler tone to show them that we care.

Prioritise their well-being

If our family member is acting unusual and showing signs that they are unwell or neglecting themselves, we can communicate more with them to show support and care.

Alternatively, we can reach out to other family members or get professional help to ensure that they are getting the support they need.

Different mental health challenges

Like all of us, our family members might experience life changes that can affect their mental health and well-being. As a family member, we can learn about the mental health challenges they might face so that we can better support them.

Sleeping Well

Coping with Stress

Managing Emotions

Understanding Depression

Living with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Managing Anxiety Disorder

Preventing Self-harm and Suicide

Coping with Grief

Undergoing Transitions

Sleeping Well

Our family members may be experiencing difficulty falling or staying asleep. If we notice them going through this, we can read more about sleep health and useful tips to share with them.

Coping with Stress

New experiences and life transitions might bring about stress and it is important for us to help our family members manage stress before it overwhelms them.

Click here to learn some tips that we can share with them about stress management.

Managing Emotions

When things get overwhelming, our family members might experience intense emotions. We can help them learn to be more aware of their emotions and manage them better.

Click here to pick up some tips that you can share with them on managing emotions.

Understanding Depression

It is normal to feel sad occasionally, but if we notice our family members feeling down over an extended period, they could be suffering from depression. To better support them, we can learn more about what they are going through and how to seek help.

Here are some tips on caring for family members with depression:

Be patient and understanding

Depression can drain a person’s energy and drive. At times, our family members might appear irritable, impatient, or say hurtful things but try to not take it to heart as these may be due to their condition and not necessarily directed at us.

Here are other things to take note of when our family members are not acting in their usual ways:

Empathise with them
Know that they are trying their best
Do not judge or criticise them
Avoid telling them to be positive or “snap out of it”
Refrain from blaming them or pressuring them to get well soon

Look out for warning signs of suicide

People with depression may have an increased risk of suicide . Be prepared by knowing the concerning behaviours to look out for. If our family members display any signs of suicide, take it seriously and consider seeking professional support.

Living with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

OCD is one of the top three most common mental health conditions. If our family members have OCD, they might constantly have intrusive thoughts and ritualistic behaviours that cause them distress and anxiety. To better support them, we can learn more about what they are going through and how to seek help.

Here are some tips on caring for family members with OCD:

Manage our expectations and recognise small improvements

Give our family members the time that they need to improve. Their progress may sometimes seem insignificant to us (e.g. a decrease rather than complete stop in excessively long showers), but it might have taken a lot for them to accomplish.

We can encourage them to keep trying by consistently acknowledging their small accomplishments and praising them.

Avoid judging or making negative remarks

Try to remain open and refrain from making negative remarks about their behaviours. Show our support by lending a listening ear and encouraging them to share about their struggles.

Be mindful not to accommodate their obsessive thoughts and compulsions

Try not to offer assurance about their intrusive thoughts or help them perform certain rituals as this will not be in their best interests in the long term.

It is important to continue maintaining usual family routines while not reinforcing OCD behaviours. We can also consider bringing our family members to seek professional help if it interferes with their daily lives.

Managing Anxiety Disorder

It is normal to feel anxious at times, but it can be concerning if our family members often feel uneasy and have trouble controlling their worries. If it comes to a point where their daily life is affected, it might be a sign of anxiety disorder. To better support them, we can learn more about what they are going through and how to seek help.

Here are some tips on caring for family members with anxiety disorder:

Understand that supporting avoidance or forcing confrontation are not solutions

Avoidance is not helpful for their anxiety in the long run. Try not to help our family members avoid situations that they are fearful of (e.g. by taking over their task so they can avoid doing them).

However, remember to practise discretion when doing this. If they start to show extreme fear, refrain from forcing them to confront the fear as it could cause them additional distress and affect their trust in us.

Encourage them to focus on things that they can control

Help our family members learn to identify what they can and cannot control. Being able to divert their attention and energy towards what can be controlled will help them to improve their situation.

Refrain from asking them to stop worrying

Lend them a listening ear and validate their feelings instead of asking them to stop worrying. Let them know that it is okay not to be okay at times. We can also guide them to refocus their attention on other activities, like taking a walk, listening to music or going to a quiet corner where they can calm down.

Self-harm and Suicide

Amid the hustle and bustle of daily lives, we may encounter a fair share of challenges and issues. Be it financial worries, juggling family commitments or pressure at work, these challenges can bring about strong feelings of stress, self-doubt, uncertainty and fear. When these get too overwhelming, some might hurt or contemplate hurting themselves to seek relief.

Click here to learn more about self-harm and suicide as well as how to help our loved ones cope with it.

Coping with Grief

There may be times when our family member experiences losing someone or something precious to them such as a loved one, relationship, their health, or even their job. As they express their grief from this loss, they may experience difficult and overwhelming emotions such as sadness or even despair.

To better support our family member, we can learn more about the effects of grief and how we can support them through it. Click here to find out more about coping with grief.

Undergoing Transitions

As our family member progresses through their life, they will inevitably face changes, be it getting married or becoming a caregiver for their parents. These might become a source of stress, worry or frustration and may affect their mental and physical health.

Click here to learn useful tips on coping that we can share with them, as we help them through transitions that may occur in their lives.

Self-care matters

Caring for our family member while juggling other aspects of our lives can take a toll on our physical and mental well-being. Ultimately, the lack of self-care will make it more difficult for us to care for them, so we should not feel guilty about attending to our needs.

Practising and prioritising self-care will allow us to recharge and be ready to provide them with the support they need. Refer to these tips on managing stress and emotions to keep ourselves healthy.

CONTRIBUTED BY

Health Promotion Board

MindSG

Supporting our family member

Tips on supporting our family member

Different mental health challenges

Sleeping Well

Coping with Stress

Managing Emotions

Understanding Depression

Living with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Managing Anxiety Disorder

Preventing Self-harm and Suicide

Coping with Grief

Undergoing Transitions

Sleeping Well

Coping with Stress

Managing Emotions

Understanding Depression

Living with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Managing Anxiety Disorder

Self-harm and Suicide

Coping with Grief

Undergoing Transitions

Self-care matters

Supporting our
family member